FML: Lazy Sunday Thoughts

BODY TYPE: MYSELF


 Real women are fat…

…and thin and both and neither and otherwise
– Hanne Blank

Making her way inside, the host greets her with a welcoming hello.

“Would you like a soft drink?” he asks, pointing towards the array of drinks on the table nearby “we’ve got lemonade…coke…”

“No thank you, I’m alright.”

“Oh..watching your weight are we?” he says chuckling to himself as he disappears into the crowd.


Two Piece: Lady Luna Boutique | Jewelry: Wanderlust + Co  | Hair: DJs Hair Artistry

Since I was younger, I’ve always found something very wrong with the whole “real women have curves” concept.  Naturally, I have always been very skinny.  Yes I know, I’m one of those “lucky people” that can eat whatever they want and not gain weight – and don’t get me wrong I’m definitely grateful I have this quality – but I wanted to shed a little light on the other side of being naturally thin.

My whole life people have always assumed that when I reject food, it’s because I’m trying to lose or maintain my current weight or that I’m afraid of gaining weight.   But actually, I reject food because of the same reasons as everyone else. I’m just not hungry or I don’t like what’s being offered.

But back to the real women have curves thing, more than once I’ve been caught up in conversations with a group of girls all chatting about “real women having curves” and that men want a “real women” with a bit of meat they can grab onto.  In these situations there’s just me and my petite self, standing there awkwardly, feeling like I shouldn’t be there.

So how does this all link together? Well, I actually shot this outfit last year but felt too self conscious to post it.  When I wear an outfit like this in public I feel like I’m judged because I am skinny.  Skinny shaming is a thing that for some reason, seems to be more socially acceptable than fat shaming. It’s receiving comments like “I feel like I could snap your legs in two” or saying that I look like a chihuahua because my head is bigger than my body (yes, that has happened), or simply judging me for not feeling hungry or wanting to go to the gym.

So I guess my gripe with the “real women have curves” movement is that it’s not empowering to all women.  It still excludes women based on an appearance requirement that decides what a “real woman” should look like.  Females of smaller stature shouldn’t be considered less of a women and undesirable to men just because they are skinny.

So girls, next time you’re trying to empower each other and talking about how you’re “all about that bass” and that men “like big butts and they cannot lie,” maybe consider talking about how all women are real women that are beautiful as they naturally are – fat, thin, both, neither and otherwise.

Have you been judged based on your appearance?  Let me know in the comments below :)

Comments (9)

I can totally relate! I myself and skinny and petite. When I used to live in countries where there is winter with all the layers people never though that I was skinny and when summer came everybody was quite shock how skinny I was and yes I eat like a crazy mad cow. It’s sometimes not easy for us to digest when people say that we need more but our body just doesn’t gain the weight. Anyways so proud you decided to post these pictures, everybody should be confident in their own body.

Nathalie
http://www.nathalie-alexandra.blogspot.com

Hi Nathalie! Thanks for sharing your story :) For the record I also eat like crazy hahaha

I could totally relate! I hope some people won’t forget that all people comes from different sizes :)

xx Alyssa // STYLE VANITY

Hi Alyssa, thanks for sharing your thoughts! I definitely feel positive that body image for women is moving in the right direction, even if it is slowly hopefully it will mean more and more people recognise that all people come in different shapes and sizes :)

So true! I’ve been petite/skinny my whole life too. Although slowly getting more bulges now in my late 20s. Lol. People just don’t understand how some people just stay naturally skinny.

http://www.jeannieinabottleblog.com

Hi Jeanne, haha well I guess that’s natural, I have also noticed that I’m filling out a bit more which is nice :) My grandmother in more recent years also commented that I look “healthy” – previously she always told I was to skinny haha

Yes! I totally agree. Real women don’t really all have curves. We should always be empowering others to be happy and whetner you’re naturally thin or curvy doesn’t matter. It’s about us all feeling good and it’s a total insult when someone thinks you don’t eat because “you’re trying to lose weight”. I’m getting older and found there are diseases in my family so turning down food on days I don’t really crave it is just makes sense to me.

Xo,
Miki
http://mikialamode.com

Thanks for your comment Miki! Agreed it’s all about empowering people the way they are naturally and healthily.

I wrote a little something about men and women and physical “perfection” a while ago. In light of your post I thought you might enjoy it, Talyssa:

http://firedirectioncenter.blogspot.com/2013/09/a-une-mendiante-rousse.html

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